Miracle of Miracles

Probably my least favorite thing about child-rearing thus far has been the whole potty-training fiasco of the last two years. But I am happy to report that as of the Sunday before Christmas, Clark is officially potty-trained.

So here's how it went down:

Three weeks before our trip to Germany, I realize that there is no way in He-double hockey sticks that I am packing pullups across the ocean and I decide to get serious about just taking them away completely. Which I did. And Clark proceeded to pee and poop in his new undies whenever it struck his fancy. Which was often. And on carpeted areas. Always.

After two solid weeks of practically no success whatsoever, we took Clark to church on December 19th, and dropped him off with his teacher, after having taken him to the bathroom as a preemptive strike against primary class accidents. His teacher gave a lesson which included a paper crafting activity. Each child was supposed to come up with a few different ways to show appreciation for his or her parents for Christmas, to form a paper chain until Christmas.

She asked him, "Clark, what can you do to help your mom for Christmas? Do you think you could pick up your toys?" Clark replied, "No, I don't want to do that." She tried again, "Well, what about helping put away the dishes from the dishwasher?" Clark: "No, I don't want to do that." Again, she tried, "Well, Clark, don't you think your mom will be sad if you don't do something nice for her for Christmas? What do you think you can do for her?"

And Clark kind of moaned and groaned and sighed deeply and rolled his eyes and said, "Well, (dramatic pause), I guess (dramatic pause and another sigh) I could go potty in the toilet." And bless her heart, Clark's teacher enthusiastically agreed.

And I kid you not, he started going in the toilet from then on. No more dribble-down-the-leg-and-onto-the-carpet "accidents." No more pooping in the pants. No more willful rebellion against the throne!!! HALLELUIAH!!!!!

It was the best gift a child could give a mother. Until I realized just how he had been playing me this whole dang time. Little devil.