Special Things

One thing that I did last year has really changed the way Clark views himself and has improved his behavior dramatically. I read the book The Help, which I definitely recommend, and got the idea to tell my sweet boy some "special things" each night after he gets in bed. I snuggle up to him and tell him "I'm going to tell you some special things. Clark, You are good. You are brave. You are important. You are smart. You are helpful. You are kind. You are funny and you are fun! You are handsome. You are incredible. You are amazing. You are special. You are safe. (He included that one on his own.) You are loved. Mommy loves you and Daddy loves you and Heavenly Father loves you and Jesus loves you." And then I name all the other people that love him. Grandparents and friends and cousins and aunts and uncles and teachers. (He added Santa and I agreed whole-heartedly.)

After we did this the first night, he looked at me and said, "Oh! Thank you, Mommy!" And I realized that no one had ever told him those special things before. And it was my fault. I'm his Mother. I am the one that must tell him those things. It's my job, my responsibility and my privilege to do so.


Anyway, I tell him his "special things" every now and again. And he listens. And his behavior is better for it. Because he believes me.


So my challenge to all my mother friends is this; tell your children these special things. It may feel funny at first, awkward. My advice is to practice ahead of time. These are statements of power. They need to be said.